Saturday 25 January, 2020

20 Things that annoy Bajan customer service reps

We have a card machine!

We have a card machine!

The customer is always right… That’s not what every customer service rep thinks though. From in the bank, to those in the restaurants, the supermarkets and even on the ZRs, customers really try the patience of workers and seem clueless about it.

From looking at you in uniform and asking ‘Do you work here?’ to walking in a hair store and asking ‘Wunna does sell de ting hair?’ there are many more things people say daily to get under the skin of customer reps.

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Here are 20 things that many customers say or do that annoy the living daylights out of customer service persons. Do you do any of these?

(Please note in many cases, the responses are what the reps would like to say, not what they actually say.)

1. Do you have a bathroom? “No, we go outside or go home.”

2. Can I have a straw?* Looks at the box of straws on the counter for customers to take as they please*

3. Stands in the Size 7 aisle and asks ‘Where are the size 8 shoes?’

4. Ignores rep who is asking ‘Can I help you?’ Customer: In hay suh confused yuh cyan find nuttin.

5. Cashier says, ‘Follow the instructions on the screen’. Customer: I know what to do! *The card machine reads ‘Swipe card’, customer stands staring at machine* Customer: Wunna wun like It different. I aint know bout this wun. Wuh yuh is tuh do now?

6. Does not ask customer rep who is folding and packing jeans for help, pulls from the bottom and tumbles jeans all over the floor. Customer walks away.

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7. “Can I have a glass of water? Can I have sugar? And can I have some lime?” Hmmm… *waitress looks at lemonade on the menu*

8. Tries on 10 items and buys none. Leaves them all off the hangers.

9. Sneaks a white item into the fitting room.

10. Begs to try on white item. “I don’t have on makeup”. Tries to hang up said white item with brown smudges on it.

11. The sign reads ‘Only four pieces allowed in the fitting room’. “But I just have six.”

12. Tries on black item, leaves white deodorant marks on the fabric.

13. Can I have a cappuccino? *crickets chirp* That’s all. I want a cappuccino and I in a hurry. *more crickets chirp*You deaf? “You ain’t say what size yet. I still waiting.”

14. Gets to counter and continues talking on cell phone. Teller starts counting monies and walks away to get a money bag. Customer to person on the phone: Stupse! These bank tellers does tek dum good time…sickening.

15. ZR driver hangs out window ‘XYZ route, XYZ side, passing XYZ!’ Van stops at bus stop, conductor opens the door. Person looks in and steps back, then looks through the back window and spots a seat as the driver pulls off. Conductor slams door, “She cyan want dis, move from bout hay hear!”

16. May I take your order? “Not ready yet” Returns 15 minutes later. “Oh shoot! We’ll decide now.” Makes order. Waits 10 mins and calls over the waiter “How long yuh gotta wait?” Well, yuh see, you took half an hour to order, and all that time your food could have been cooking, so enjoy de Wi-Fi now till whenever um done. (That’s what the waiter would like to say.)

17. “How much fuh de coconut water skipper?” $12 dads. “Wuh I does buy a bottle fuh $10” Well go back there, dads.

18. Sweet girl tell me when you hit $100. *Cashier looks at trolley piled high with $2 000 worth of groceries*

19. “How much fuh dis?” $80 “Ort, I gine de ATM and come back” *customer rep smirks* We have a card machine. *customer chips and heads out de door*

20. *looks at de fella packing de shelves* Youngster yuh working hard or you hardly working? *focuses harder on items to pack and move faster before he responds and loses his lil pick*

Which annoys you most?

[UPDATE: Friday, July 28, 2017]

You asked for the flipside. Here is what annoys Bajan customers. Enjoy!

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